01.
Reader letter: Hello, Teacher Kai Zi, hello!
My boyfriend and I were introduced to my family. I got married with my second marriage, he was 35, and I was 28 years old.
I have a son who lives with my ex -husband at the age of four. I told me that he was willing to accept me in the past. In May this year, he met for two months of pregnancy in May this year.
Then he often gathered with his classmates. They were 7 people, and several of them were female classmates. The one who had a crush on him was not married and there were no objects. He said that the day of marriage invited him two female classmates to pick up relatives.
The day before yesterday, I dreamed of the party at night, dreaming that he was derailed, and had a relationship with the female classmate, and I told him that he would not marry him.
I told my boyfriend about dreaming the next day. He said on the phone that I was full of food and had nothing to do, so I was unhappy to hang the video. I did n’t see a message for me for two days.He asked him to answer, otherwise he would not say anything.
Do I say you have nothing to say to me?He said that he had nothing to say to me. He said that he had rarely said that he suddenly changed. I suddenly felt so wronged and wanted to cry.
In the past two months, he owed tens of thousands of yuan yet. He recognized a sister and often borrowed money with him. He borrowed 10,000 thousand. He had no money and took out from usury to his sister.
I told my boyfriend that you have no money and you will lend it to your sister. He also came out of the usury. He said that his sister would pay back and said that he was unhappy. He said that his sister was married and had a family.family.
I was so aggrieved at the time, and now my baby is not known for 12 weeks and should continue.
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Kay Zi answered: Hello girl, when you see your message, I can feel that you have a strong sense of insecurity and uncertainty about this new relationship.
You can dream of having a relationship with the female classmate, and because a dream is not married to her boyfriend, you are very good on the surface, but in fact, you can see that you are always afraid that he will not marry you who will not marry youOr you will worry that this man is not reliable.
For example, because you are married and you are pregnant, you know that you have no initiative in this relationship.
For example, he often meets with his classmates, as well as female classmates who have secretly loved him.
For example, he owed money outside, but he actually helped the so -called dry sister borrowed usury.
These of them have strong fear of the future, and you can be skeptical of a man who can give you happiness.
On the one hand, you may be afraid of being abandoned, and on the other hand, you are worried that you will be bad in the future and make you afraid that you will be abandoned, so you will dream that your boyfriend and others will have a relationship, and you will express you in the name of a dream.Dissatisfaction with certain behaviors.
I do n’t know what the first marriage is over. I can see that your first marriage is very early. I do n’t know if you also entered the marriage because you did n’t get pregnant first.
If so, then you might as well compare with the previous marriage, think about whether your situation is the same as the past situation, why your previous marriage is over, and those unstable factor that leads to the failure of marriage is in this paragraph.Whether there is a relationship.
I have to say why some people fall into a vicious cycle of life, as if people who have never been able to meet the right people have always been unable to have happiness. This is because you have never thought about what you want.What kind of marriage you want.
How can this be happy?
You ask me, the baby is 12 weeks after 12 weeks, I don’t know if I want to go on.You are not familiar with this man, and you do n’t take measures when you have a relationship. You do n’t know if you are responsible for yourself. So how do you teach you what to do?
I hope that the sisters will not even want to make a child for a man and marry this man.
With a brainless Sui Bo, it will hurt you for a lifetime!
When you do n’t protect yourself, do n’t plan for yourself, or you may not even have the initiative. So how do you choose your own life direction correctly?
If you are like her, you do n’t know how to make a choice that suits you in some important decisions. You can trust me privately. I will help you analyze the advantages and disadvantages, and help you find the most suitable choice.
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02.
Reader’s letter: Hello, Teacher Kai Zi, I got married with my husband for three years in a long distance. I was pregnant in the month after marriage. During the birth of a child, I found that her husband talked to shake a strange woman on WeChat, and then quarreled two or three times for this matter.
Every time I cry very sad, every time he also said that he won’t talk about it later, and deleted his friends
But it didn’t take long to find that he was chatting on the Internet again. I would like to ask the teacher how to solve the problem?
What causes him to hurt my heart like this.I love him very much, and I will think about him everywhere, and he is good to treat his mother. He also admits it.
But where is the question, please ask the teacher to help answer.
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Kaizi replied: Hello girl, you can see that you feel very wronged, then let me talk about my husband derailed during your pregnancy. Why?
There are two possibilities.
1. For 3 years in a long distance, you do not know enough about you. You did not see the problem of your husband’s character.
2. The mode of getting along with you after marriage is wrong, and you will not communicate. Without a deep understanding and running -in, you will enter the marriage, leaving too many hidden dangers for each other’s relationship.
Where is the problem between you? I don’t know, it may be one of them, or there may be both problems.
But I think no matter what it is, unless you decide to give up, you have to think about what errors have made in this relationship.
It can be seen from your husband’s always online chat that there are not many topics between your husband and wife.
If both your husband and wife have endless words, why do he find someone else to say it, right?
What he said to you, from you, you can’t get a response from you, or it is difficult to say with you, there are fewer topics with you, and maybe there will be contradictions between you, from time to time, you will quarrel. At this time, what will he do at this time?, I want to escape and talk, at this time he will get more and more to talk to women outside.
You said you love him very much, thinking about him everywhere, he also betrayed you really too much.
But you also have to think about it. You can think about him like this. He can still talk online, regardless of your feelings, and even more you have to conceive his child, then he is a scumbag, or your love may bring him to himIs it depression and burden?
Because you are not very specific, I can’t answer you more detailed.
But if you still want to maintain your marriage, you must realize that the communication and mode of getting along with you must be a problem.
And where is the problem, this requires you to find it slowly through learning and promotion.Especially if your child is still young, you need to maintain this family better.
Don’t let the relationship viciously circulate. If he is noisy with him, he will feel that communication with you is very depressed, and he will ask others to talk, and you will be more noisy.
Do you think so, in the end it becomes a vicious cycle, your marriage will only get worse and worse, so you have to just happen to just happen to prevent it.
Do not consume this way. It is not good for you, children, and marriage.
So how to adjust the state of both parties and where do you want to start? You can trust me privately. Let me tell you what to do and what to do.
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